An open letter to spammers

Okay, first of all, don't let my general loathing for you get in the way of your enjoying this letter. I'm genuinely trying to help here. I think if we can turn on that little bulb above your head, everyone can benefit.

Okay, so, I want to clarify that although I include "Opt-out" mailings as spam they are by no means included in this. In my mind, opt-out mail companies, like Mac Mall/PC Mall take the email addresses they have accumulated (usually from you buying their products) and sell them to "related companies" who also want to sell you stuff that they know, for sure, you probably want. For example, buy a computer at Mac Mall, and you get software advertisements from some other company. Never mind that they WILL NOT EVER remove your address from their list, and even though they make it so that you can legally "opt out" of any list they create, they can, AT ANY TIME, create new lists to put you on.

No, The spam that I'm addressing is a step slimier than that. These are the guys who use one of several means to gather your email address (web spiders, list hijackers, viral infection, purchase from opt out companies) and try to sell you stuff you DON'T want, nor have ever inquired about, though hijacked servers. Often, these schemes are just covers for credit card frauds and such.

But here's where we get to the point. The following subject line was on a letter to me:
~~~Good day :~~~Vicodi~ _ P~ercocet~~~
Okay, we get it. you're offering Vicodin and Percocet. Notice that the two primary ingredients are changed so that humans will pattern recognize the names but computers, specifically spam filters, won't read it. Thus, you can get your spam in front of human eyes instead of automatically getting filtered.

But, (now, listen closely) anyone who has a spam filter is willing to lose the occasional real letter, making their life just that more irritating, in order to avoid getting letters JUST LIKE THIS. So, why the alteration to slip it through? Are you hoping that someone will say "Wait, Vicodin AND Percocet???? i gots to get me some of that!"

Okay, so, I get it, just one sucker clicking the wrong thing will become subject of identity theft or some other form of fraud that could be worth thousands to you. But if people are already filtering you, why the deception? Someone who has a filter is ALREADY WISE to your schemes. And any companies providing mail service will have even better spam traps. SO WHAT'S THE POINT.

Why don't you restrict yourself to fraudulent porn sites and such? I mean the only grubworm lower than someone who would defraud the public in a manner like this would have to be the person who actually tries to buy pharmaceuticals on the internet.