Cold and Flu season

"An expectorant increases bronchial secretions and mucolytics help loosen thick bronchial secretions. Expectorants reduce the thickness or viscosity of bronchial secretions thus increasing mucus flow that can be removed more easily through coughing, Mucolytics break down the chemical structure of mucus molecules. The mucus becomes thinner and can be removed more easily through coughing" (Adams, Holland, & Bostwick, 2008, p. 591).

One of the worst rated drugs available over the counter is a cough syrup that contains both an expectorant AND a cough suppressant. If you read the above definition again, it should become quite clear why. Since the popularity of the first medication to contain this combination went through the roof, many others have followed.

But the problem isn't so much with the products, but with the drug-seeking culture we live in. People drink this stuff to get high. It doesn't just suppress symptoms, it makes you feel stoned. That's why it's popular. And then, because it's popular, people who don't know the definition of the word "expectorant" buy it because everyone else does.

Fortunately for most people, the expectorant in Robitussin DM isn't proven to work. It's only medicinal function is as a cough suppressant. Unfortunately that doesn't keep the knock-offs from using actual expectorants. And the people who take those medications usually end up with a mild form of pneumonia caused by unreleased mucous in the lungs.

*sigh*

Read a label this week. Read one every week. Understand what you read.

Columbus day

Things to do while waiting for the mail on Columbus Day

Really, there's nothing like Columbus Day for the ultimate non-holiday. He didn't "discover" America. How can you "discover" a place that's already occupied? He wasn't even the the first European to get here, the vikings clearly made it first. And before them, the Asians traded Jade here. And long before that, on the steppes of russia, someone crossed an ice bridge to get here and start the human population. But, the mail stops running anyway. So here's a few things to do to "honor" his "achievement".

• Go on a LONG trip (kinda goes without saying). But not just around the corner, you need to go somewhere SO FAR that someone else has to fund your trip.


• Remember, you can ignore the accepted laws of nature when you do. 1000 years before columbus sailed, the size of the earth was known. To sail from England straight to China is almost as long a trip as going 'round the other way. The difference is: no place to stop (if the America's aren't there). The crew was near starvation when they landed in Bermuda.


• Go someplace that doesn't speak your language, but don't take a translator. Off to China, no one even speaks Mandarin.


• Go looking for drugs. Columbus was looking for a faster Opium trade route.


• Remember, No matter where you end up, that's where you meant to arrive. If you're heading for Florida and end up in Ohio, make sure to call them all "Gators". Columbus died believing he had landed on India, twice. He didn't take an interpreter the second time either.


• Make friends wherever you end up. And of course we treat our friends properly by raping, enslaving and killing them. Once they're dead, you can plunder their homes.

My first whack at parody

When did the internet start?

I was looking for a line in the UK series Red Dwarf when I came across a plethora of pages musing about the beginnings of the internet. Many answers were given from 1965 when the first email was sent to 1991 when the world wide web was released.

Okay, first of all, the internet is not email. You wouldn't be reading this if it was. And it's not the web either. I worked with the Xanadu project team who were the ones responsible for writing Hypertext. Html was supposed to allow people to transmit documents and keep the biblios in order. The current version is a complete travesty compared to the original intent.

No, look at the word: Inter- net. You see, once upon a time, you couldn't connect from one side of the country to the other without a long distance call. Yes, in the early 80s there were "networks" but most people did internet stuff on local "Bulletin Boards". Mostly colleges and universities provided local network access, and major providers like AOL (Apple on line), Prodigy (no, not the band), and Genie were just huge, dialup boards with no national connectivity.

Some nodes, that had overlapping service, would connect to each other to allow users to extend services to greater areas. I used to dial up to a BBS called MNet. It served southern Michigan via dialup and short wave (yes, transmission of modem signal over ham radio... the first WiFi). MNet was within the boundaries of MichNet, the local Michigan Statewide network. MichNet could connect to Ilinet, the university of Chicago, which had a link to Some Corporation in St.Paul. These sorts of links went on and on.

Eventually, these links became part of ARPANET. A network begun on the west coast and reached all the way across to the country by the 1970s. And legitimately, this could be called an internet. However, it was never intended as a public access net. A great deal of email traffic was sent through Arpa, true, but this was almost exclusively amongst college staff and students. The real internet was yet to come.

In the early 80s, the National Science Foundation was considering linking up Arpa, local networks, and a number of supercomputers to the national board servers to see if they could benefit from it, and added a second net for the military. It was the inception of the NSF net that was the real internet. Finally AOL could email UMass and then off to Xerox in California. the date of decision for this great project was April 15th 1985. It took until 1986 to really get going.

They decided to wait 10 years before the first review, but it took no time at all. By 1990, All the major providers had linked up and the local networks like Michnet and individual universities; and they were all working pretty much seamlessly in one vast network. This was the first real "internet". In 1995, the NSF reviewed the internet and decided that the NSFNet was more of a distraction than an aid. So the project was ended and the connections were rebuilt by the private sector. It took a few weeks to stabilize, but when it came back on line, May of 1995, we had the Internet as we know it today.

Micro Solar

I was talking with a friend about transitions of technology, and she mentioned that it seemed like anything that saved a lot of people money and environmental stress moved so much slower than cheap easy ways to make money, like vinyl to tape to cds to iPods. Somewhere a long the line, it occurred to me, The biggest problem with the solar movement is the big ticket up front with no appreciable service jump or payoff in sight. However, people have seemed to grasp the concept of the CFL bulbs (*shudder*) just fine.

Then I came up with an idea. If someone could make a small device, and a modular solar system, solarizing a house could be done in increments. For example if the refrigerator could be plugged into a box that was plugged into a wall outlet AND to a solar panel such that the power provided to the panel was converted and delivered as the preferred source to the device, then people start saving Immediately, even with a fairly small system. Modularize the panels so that one plugs into another like those little Honda generators to increase the wattage each time and people can save a little to get a new panel rather then taking out a loan to do the whole job.

But wait, there's more. We have devices designed to create shade (oddly, called "shades"). Instead of a rooftop device, what about an easily installed, fixed window awning that provides solar power? and who says they have to be square? Couldn't a solar panel be manufactured in attractive shapes and such to help blend in with decorating motifs? Imagine a victorian cut panel over your sink, that feeds a battery. The battery is plugged into a small regulator that powers your garbage disposal. Later, you put one on the roof to help power your fridge, and another one later that powers your TV. It may take years to "go off the grid" but that's years of reduced power usage. And most importantly, these smaller systems could be installed in apartments and rentals on a temporary basis and moved with the occupant. This would quadruple the customer base in a minute.

A hopefully helpful though sent out into the world.
If you use it, think well of me
- EJ "Tedward" LeCouteur

An open letter to spammers

Okay, first of all, don't let my general loathing for you get in the way of your enjoying this letter. I'm genuinely trying to help here. I think if we can turn on that little bulb above your head, everyone can benefit.

Okay, so, I want to clarify that although I include "Opt-out" mailings as spam they are by no means included in this. In my mind, opt-out mail companies, like Mac Mall/PC Mall take the email addresses they have accumulated (usually from you buying their products) and sell them to "related companies" who also want to sell you stuff that they know, for sure, you probably want. For example, buy a computer at Mac Mall, and you get software advertisements from some other company. Never mind that they WILL NOT EVER remove your address from their list, and even though they make it so that you can legally "opt out" of any list they create, they can, AT ANY TIME, create new lists to put you on.

No, The spam that I'm addressing is a step slimier than that. These are the guys who use one of several means to gather your email address (web spiders, list hijackers, viral infection, purchase from opt out companies) and try to sell you stuff you DON'T want, nor have ever inquired about, though hijacked servers. Often, these schemes are just covers for credit card frauds and such.

But here's where we get to the point. The following subject line was on a letter to me:
~~~Good day :~~~Vicodi~ _ P~ercocet~~~
Okay, we get it. you're offering Vicodin and Percocet. Notice that the two primary ingredients are changed so that humans will pattern recognize the names but computers, specifically spam filters, won't read it. Thus, you can get your spam in front of human eyes instead of automatically getting filtered.

But, (now, listen closely) anyone who has a spam filter is willing to lose the occasional real letter, making their life just that more irritating, in order to avoid getting letters JUST LIKE THIS. So, why the alteration to slip it through? Are you hoping that someone will say "Wait, Vicodin AND Percocet???? i gots to get me some of that!"

Okay, so, I get it, just one sucker clicking the wrong thing will become subject of identity theft or some other form of fraud that could be worth thousands to you. But if people are already filtering you, why the deception? Someone who has a filter is ALREADY WISE to your schemes. And any companies providing mail service will have even better spam traps. SO WHAT'S THE POINT.

Why don't you restrict yourself to fraudulent porn sites and such? I mean the only grubworm lower than someone who would defraud the public in a manner like this would have to be the person who actually tries to buy pharmaceuticals on the internet.

E-coli happens

It's a med-tech joke. Really, you don't want to know.

I light myself on fire for a living. I've looked down many gun barrels held in fear, anger, duty, and jealousy. I've been shot, stabbed, frozen, drowned, electrocuted, hit by cars, fought with horses, angry women, bullies, and dragons. I've died in the desert sun, on mountain snow, on grassy field, and on placid lake. I've stepped through deaths door so often, I have my own coffee mug there.

But never have felt so fragile and helpless as in the hands of the AMA. So, in case my feelings for them aren't clear, I've asked the ghost of Johnny Cash to help out...

On the other hand, despite my brush with the only Drug Pushers I've ever had the displeasure to meet, I feel that I leave the better for it. I have data confirmation that my self-diagnosis over the years have been 100% correct. And despite a little brush with what must have been acid reflux a couple years ago, my heart is in fine shape.

Yes, I'm a fat bastard who needs to lose weight. And I already took the first few steps towards that goal. I bough an iPod so that I had something to listen to on walks (personal best this week, I broke the 20 minute mile). And I recently bought a real refrigerator.

You see, since I moved in to Culver City over 6 years ago, I've had this tiny mini fridge as my only unit. Sounds great until you realize you can't have frozen foods, or large quantities of anything that can spoil. Basically, it sucks. But now I can keep whole heads of lettuce, healthy snacks, all fruit popsicles, etc in there and know they'll come out right. It's remarkably improved my eating habits.

Plus, I feel even more empowered to continue listening to my body (and totem) for dietary cues. So far, they've been dead on with what I need.

In short, I feel like a new man. And it only cost me $800, three needle pricks, completely toxifying myself with bad prescriptions, and a couple weeks of stress.

Alchemic Tango

So, I recently had a pretty severe inner ear infection that caused me to break a 12 year streak and seek medical attention from the 'guys with the good drugs'. That's right, the almighty, allopathic, AMA. One ear infection and I end up spending $800 for a blinding array of tests to have them tell me the things I diagnosed for myself were, in fact, the case. Oh, and here, take some pills. Never mind that the things we "just caught in the nick of time" are things I've known about and have been treating for years. Oh, and here, take some pills. Never mind that ALL I wanted to do was get some antibiotics for my ear. Oh, and here, take some pills.

The AMA was formed to combat hucksterism and the patented medicine industry. If you're drawing a blank here, think of Sweeney Todd and the Pirelli's Miracle Elixir scene. Oh, and here, take some pills. In this case, Todd would be the humble and well-intentioned AMA, and Pirelli would be the shameless huckster portrayed in the movie. Thing is, the AMA did eventually move on to the atrocities displayed in the movie by Todd: literally cutting the throats of it's competition (in some cases) to attain dominance over american medicine. Oh, and here, take some pills.

Now, I walk out of the clinic with 6 bottles of pills, multiple punctures, referrals for two specialists, and a pear tree up my partridge. These last few days have incited more stress in me than the last 10 years of running my own business. Oh, and here, take some pills. Never mind that I found some startling similarities between my 'treatment' there and typical cult indoctrinations: 15 hour fast, separation from home, change of name, group-specific terminology, and let's not forget the drugs. Oh, and here, take some pills.

And now, having googled all the various pills they gave me, I find that one of them counteracts another, two cause symptoms that counteract each other, the one pill I feared most turns out to be the most innocuous of the bunch and the ones they put me on first are the most likely to kill me. Yaaay... Oh, and here, take some pills.